Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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