you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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