dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
