so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
