she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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