Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
