They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
