I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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