She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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