I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Randomize
