The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
