ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
