Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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