Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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