If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I supernannyed him into submission
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
