help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize