I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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