I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Its about making memories worth repressing
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize