uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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