We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
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