brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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