The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
