This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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