Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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