Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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