$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
