is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize