There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
