We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
