It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
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