Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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