why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize