You can't special order awesome
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
