This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
the day after is always just damage control
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
