Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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