Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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