Grow some girl-balls and come out already
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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