this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
