Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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