In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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