All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
