Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
