I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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