Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
