like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Randomize
