Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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