Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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