batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize