Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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