i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The beer is more important than you right now.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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